Well, thats nice... (+book rec)

I have little faith in OPKs after my 3rd cycle on clomid (100mg) and I only got faint/almost dark enough test lines. It sucked! But I ovulated well. I'm sure I missed my surge but it is still frustrating nonetheless. This cycle has me cautiously optimistic. This picture is dark, but you get the jest-

It's hard to tell, but this was over the course of a day and a half. They progressively got darker and even with my Dollar Tree cheapie, the test line was actually darker. This is definitely a first time for me! Is it weird that I'm excited..just for that alone? The Husband was just as excited as I was! 

That being said, IF can play havoc on the strongest of marriages. I am glad to say that The Husband is not a "statistic" (his words). He has become so involved without being too intrusive, it's been amazing. I really do not know what I would ever do with out that man. He may not open the car door for me every time we go somewhere, but he sure does no when to tell me everything will be okay and "one day..". That's all that matters, folks. 

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I have been on a self-help/infertility book kick this week- the latest one I have read was 

Managing The Stress Of Infertility: How To Balance Your Emotions, Get The Support You Need, And Deal With Painful Social Situations When You're Trying To Become Pregnant by Carol Fulwiler Jones MA. This was BY FAR one of the best books I've read in a while. Though I was slightly disappointed because she did not include any yoga for infertility (she is an instructor), however, I have gained so much insight. I have ADD and usually take vyvanse when not TTC...obviously I can't take it while we are trying, so it has definitely been a challenge in all aspects of my life: school, work, and socially. I get very overwhelmed when I am unmedicated so I am always looking for a new "anti-stress" exercise. This book was full of them! I have started 'positive thinking' and imagery before I go to bed. It has relaxed me and allowed me to believe in myself! One of the key points to this book was- let the thoughts and negativity pass. It is okay to have a thought, but do not store it like christmas decorations. Allow it to leave you and allow yourself to be happy and prepared for the next step. I needed to hear that this weekend. Being mid cycle 5 of 6 on clomid is petrifying. But knowing that I WILL become a mom some day- rather it be a clomid cycle, IVF, adoption - whatever....that is the reason I will wake up every morning and give it my all. 


I hope everyone has a fabulous week and get those BFPs, ladies! xoxo