CD3- again.

Here we go again with another round of Clomid. I didn't get bumped up dosage wise because I responded weak but responded nonetheless last month. Dumb! Ok not dumb but obviously the whole process is frustrating. I'm actually really pumped for this. Every month I look forward to taking it then a couple of weeks later...disappointment. At least I get the opportunity, I guess. And luckily The Husband and I are growing stronger because of it. On to better stuff- vacation is in 5 days! I can hardly believe it. I need this so much. If its already not evident, I really love that guy I married. Of course we bicker, but honestly we enjoy each others company. We think the same. And we do the annoying that where you finish each others sentences. Lame but it's our thing. :) Annnnd...besides one final, I am done done DUN with school for the summer. Hot damn! This semester tested my patience an next semester is on the way of being worse. I'm so glad to be getting so much closer to my degree. It's nice to see that light. It may be a speck but it makes it worth wild. Our weekends was sort of anti-climactic. We did some housework, I washed about 6 (yes!!) loads of laundry, started to pack, booked an airbrush tan, and shopped. Oh and we napped. Haha. What weekend is complete without that one? The worst part of the weekend- I think I'm getting a cold!! Gross. This sucks! That's was my excuse for a nap...totally worked 5 D A Y S

Oh for the love of progesterone!

I am going on CD22/9DPO and I had started progesterone treatment on Monday. First let me say that its is absolutely disgusting, I will do it without complaining too much, but really its freaking gross. Also, the side effects I have recieved from it aren't very fun at all. Back aches, constantly hungry, HORRIBLE headaches, tired beyond belief, moody (or so The Husband say..:) ), frequent peeing, along with a lot more crazy things that I didn't realize I was signing up for. I don't like to consult Dr. Google too much, unless Im absolutely certain I may be dying or something.. (obviously, Dr Google is the first spot a rational person would go to, right?). That being said, I wasn't very aware of what I would have as far as side effects. I did read some people's experiences on TheBump and other sites, but they varied so much, its hard to see what you'll take from it until your time.

Did I mention how forgetful it has made me? I stopped taking my ADD medicine for obvious reasons. I am a full-time student, so it definitely makes it a challenge, but I was stepping up to the plate and doing okay. This progesterone has reversed any effort I have attempted to try to alleviate my ADD. Holy Moly. Not the best time for it either, since the semester is coming to an end! Yay/boo!

On the up side...we're going on our cruise in...14 days!!!!!!!!!! Carnival Magic!

A better day.

As opposed to yesterday, this day could not be any more uneventful...and I've never been so happy.

The did end up finding Baby Keegan last night and he was in the process of going home to his father last time I checked.

They found the woman who did it and she is clearly not mentally stable.

http://www.chron.com/news/houston-texas/article/Mom-killed-baby-abducted-outside-Woodlands-child-3489348.php#photo-2829622

The whole story makes me physically ill! I feel so horrible for the family and pray for support for them.


At least, he is safe.

Honey, come home!

So here I sit at 7:26pm. I've been home for an hour and The Husband should've been home and hour and a half ago....but he's not here.

I'm not sure I have ever mentioned but he is in law enforcement and I couldn't be more proud of him. He's my hero on so many levels its ridiculous.

In our area it has been nuts for him and his guys. There was an officer related shooting last night that involved his BFF. Thats not his first friend who has been involved in a shooting this year, so that rubbed me in a very weird way this morning. Not something I wanted to wake up to and SEE on the news.

Then this afternoon, a new mom (just a year older than me), was taking her 3 DAY OLD baby out of the pediatrician and putting him in the car..when she was shot NINE times. They kidnapped her baby and are now on the run.
Here is the AMBER ALERT! for the baby!

And then I get a text for The Husband "I love you babe and Ill be home later." :(
Thats when the calls and texts pour in. "IS HE AT THE SWAT STANDOFF?" Well.....that would explain it, wouldn't it. When I talked to him after the mother was shot, he was ready to find this baby and the deplorable humans that did that. He did not want to come home until they were found. Bless his heart. I think , with us and our challenges, it has put an even bigger importance on parenthood. He felt that loss for that mother and father and that family. He has felt it just like I have.

I could not be married to a better man.

CD13

I can safely say, I have had a wonderful week. No horrible side effects (s/e) or any 'rage.' Another one of those Clo-moody s/e I was SO worried about. I am Italian and Irish, so Im already a pistol. The Husband told me that I have caught myself before getting angry, which is way better than usual. Hey, maybe Im having reverse effects with the Clomid. Haha! In about 4 days we will enter our 2WW (two week window) before I can take the first (of many, Im sure) pregnancy tests. It feels like every day is the slowest day of my life. Hopefully this weekend will go by and I can make it to our cruise in May...

I can't wait for that dang cruise!

Can I have a Saturday redo?

Well today just isnt my day is it? I was debating how I was going to start this off...with the positive or with the negative. I think Ill start with my bitchfest so then I can embrace the positive more eloquently. In fact, I thought about posting this on 3TC but I didnt want anyone to give me a tiny violin to play.

Lets get down to it- today SUCKED!!

I had already had it in my mind that it was going to be an exceptionally boring, homework filled day. I guess thats better than doing laundry all day like my usual Saturday plans.

First I woke up late........That always pisses me off.

Then, I started to research Spain for my geography report and clicked on the wrong link. HORRIBLE! Usually its The Husband that craps out our computers so I had no idea what to do. Honestly, Im not sure what or how I did what I did but Ive got this puppy running great now! (wait, that was a positive thing, right?) Really that composed a lot of my day and I was already an emotional mess between the clomid and estradiol, I've become very sensitive to things that normally don't get me very irritated.

After dinner, I had to (yes, HAD to, ha) run to Kohl's to spend my "Kohl's Cash."  Found some things and went to the grocery. Totally forgot to get half of what I went for and I had to carry the groceries in by myself. That last bit sounds very obnoxious but there are a few things in this house that we have designated "men duties" and "women duties." Call it barbarick if you want, but really it works, it just needs better names. :) Some of the Women Duties are cleaning the bathroom and mopping. The Men Duties include (but definitely are not limited to): taking out the trash, taking the trash cans out, bringing them back in, carrying the groceries in, complaining that I didn't wash his socks. That last one is a right of passage, or something.

I get home and I am bombarded with photos on FB. Bad mistake. The first part of my day I could have dealt with, but that part was very painful. Seeing as its Easter and families get together on Easter, I should've expected to see pictures posted of "what could have been" with our kin adoption. Just more recently I have been okay with it. In fact, I have prayed and prayed for peace and understanding through this whole thing.
I got through Christmas.
I got the New Years and Valentine's...but Easter it hits me.
To see pictures is like a knife to the heart. I don't want to look but I feel like I should. I should be happy that things seem to be working out..for them. This is obviously not the case for us. I feel sorry for myself and I feel even more sorry for The Husband. I'm a very strong woman and tend to be on the more optimistic side of life, but this trips me every time. I feel like not only has this situation not been successful for us ...my body is not being successful for us.
The good thing about being an "adult" in this situation is that we get to choose who to associate ourselves with. This includes family. But at what point will the questions start? I guess I really should just worry about myself and let everyone else think what the must.

The last thing I want to do is offend someone, but if Im not ready.....Im not ready. And I think thats just fine.

I'm glad I had saved the positive for the end...:)

-I fixed the computer, thats pretty super awesome..that EVEN I ( :) I know a few of yall will get that reference ) CAN DO IT!
-I finished a major project. Well, for the most part, at least.
-I got to have dinner at home with my lovely, most amazing, handsome (you get the picture) husband.
-I went shopping!
-We're going on our cruise in 4 weeks from tomorrow!
-I have 3 of the cutest weenies EVER!
-I have my health..kind of.


What a Debbie Downer post!
I bet tomorrow will be  better.

Day 1 (CD3)

I took my first Clomid this evening at 6pm. I've never been so excited to take a dang pill in my life.

I know this is not a 'magic' pill, but after everything last year, it is a GREAT thing to be able to try out. I think I handled our IF in so  much secret and bared much of the stress internally that now...Im relaxed. Im excited, I know my options, and all I can do is keep looking up. Im in for a bumpy road, but its nothing I cannot handle. The Husband is all too excited about this. 'Mind you, we have been charting, counting, using hollistic measures, etc for YEARS...so this...although its much of the same is totally new.